Book: Heroics for
Beginners
Author: John Moore
Published: 2004 (Penguin)
Pages: 246
Prince Kevin’s really more of a diplomat (some would say
“coward,” but he’d give them a really dirty stare) than a warrior, so when he
learns that his love Princess Rebecca has to marry the first guy who rescues
her dad’s Infernal Artifact from the evil overlord who stole it for a hefty
dose of science-as-magic mcguffin, he leans heavily on a practical guide to
becoming a hero.
Becky already loves him and they go to half-hearted sitcom
trope lengths to hide their lusty high school-sweethearts-level relationship,
so all Kevin really has to worry about is getting zapped by He Who Must Be
Named, Lord Voltmeter (ten bucks if you CAN’T name that allusion), beating
another flashier hunkier dude to the chase, and getting tied up/seduced by
Voltmeter’s evil assistant. Oh and finding his way out of the evil fortress,
which is harder than it seems and more helpful to his battle than it sounds.
The writing is funny, using a big dose of wise-assery to
make sure the story never takes itself seriously but still managing to wring
suspense out of it. There’s nothing too radically subversive—it stays on the
“hey, aren’t these conventions a little ridiculous but don’t you love them
anyway?” side of teasing—but it’s propulsive and convincing and a great way to
ease into fantasy through the gift shop.
Bookshelf! Except somebody else’s because I need something
to take with me to a holiday party thrown by an RPG-er.
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